rebirth /rēˈbərTH/: noun - the process of being reincarnated or born again.
A white trans man with light green hair is wearing a black fishnet shirt and sits in a computer chair with downcast eyes. He has a septum ring and is wearing black lipstick and white, black, and grey eye makeup.
Realizing I was transgender was a rebirth for me in many ways. I’d always been into makeup, nails, hair. But something always felt different. I liked doing “normal” makeup, but I didn’t want to be pretty in the way girls are pretty, I wanted to be pretty in the way that boys are pretty. Toward the end of high school, I started to become aware of the trans community. I started questioning, but I knew I couldn’t come out in my hometown. It was a dark point in my life.
The beginning of my transition was freeing–and terrifying. In college, finally surrounded by other trans people, I came out. I started using he/him pronouns, and going by the name Theo. I felt so at home in myself. But in an effort to have people take me seriously, and to be seen as a “real” man, I stopped doing all of the “feminine” things I loved. And I was miserable.
A white trans man with dark blond hair is wearing a black tank top and standing in front of the trans pride flag. He has a septum ring and wears a smokey eye in shades of brown, and his red lipstick is intentionally smeared over his chin.
Today I’m trying to be the queer mentor I needed when I was younger. Openly gay, openly trans, openly myself. I want to be so completely me that other people feel empowered to live their truths. I’m a man. I am a gay, trans, queer man. I love makeup, and I am no less of a man for that. I am no less of a man because I am everything society tells us men shouldn't be. On a good day, if you ask me, it makes me more of one.
A white trans man with blond hair is wearing a black tank top and standing in front of the trans pride flag. He has a septum ring and red lipstick. A rainbow mask formed by eyeshadow stretches across his face.
A white trans man with pale blue hair and a septum ring stares straight at the camera. He wears a black shirt and his head is tilted slightly to the left.
About the Author
Theo Canavan is a gay trans man living in Albany, NY. He got his psychology degree at the College of Saint Rose and is planning on pursuing a masters degree in Social Work. His end goal is to open a queer sanctuary of sorts where people can go and stay the night if they need, get a hot meal, and acquire resources of all kinds. In his spare time he makes art, cooks, and hones his makeup skills.